“You don’t belong here: you are a fraud! Why would smart people ever want to listen to you?” whispered the manager to the salesperson. Galvanized by this wake-up call that he desperately needed, the employee rose to the occasion and exceeded all expectations. Does this sound realistic? Of course not! Who would feel upbeat by such senseless, demotivating speech? This scenario obviously never existed – and yet the speech is 100% authentic: I heard it from a sales executive last week. It wasn’t directed at a team member though: it was directed at himself. Your inner critic: your #1 judge. We all have an inner voice that continuously judges us. Its main message varies from person to person; in next week’s newsletter, we will see how to identify your inner voice’s main messages. In this week’s newsletter, we will discuss its negative impact on yourself and on your ability to grow your business, and what to do about it. One of my client CEOs’ inner voice calls him a “loser who sets the wrong example to his team and will never be a successful entrepreneur” when he doesn’t take over what his team members fail to accomplish. My inner voice calls me “lazy and complacent who will fail as an entrepreneur and a father” when I am idle for more than 2 minutes, even on vacation – and makes me feel guilty and shameful every single time it happens. Our inner critic pretends to be helpful and necessary to our success, but its long-term impact is unequivocally negative. Why do we keep listening to our inner critic, even though it is obvious that its message is utterly uninspiring and demotivating? What can we do about it? How does your inner critic afflict your performance? Our inner critic constantly finds faults with self (for past mistakes or current shortcomings), with others, and with circumstances. This judge sounds helpful at first sight by shedding light on our shortcomings. While it has the appearance of a helper, it is a bully that blackmails us with shame and guilt, with pretty dramatic consequences in the long run. It tells you: “Without me pushing you, you will be unworthy of love / attention / success.” Your inner critic negatively affects you in three significant ways: Your inner critic has a long-term damaging impact on your own performance. Your inner critic acts like a radioactive armor: it pretends to be protective but its long-term impact on your performance is always disastrous. Let’s get back to the two examples above: Client CEO: To respond to the guilt of not being the ideal leader his inner critic describes, this CEO feels the pressure from his inner critic to micro-manage his team when they don’t deliver, at the risk of becoming his company’s #1 growth roadblock – with the negative consequences on his team and on business growth that you can imagine. In response to my guilty feeling of missing out on learning opportunities for my children (and hence of not being a good father) if I am idle on vacation, I take them on high-tempo sightseeing trips (“We only live once, let’s get the most out of it”, right?) –  with, here again, the exact opposite long-term impact on my effectiveness as a father. “The inner critic is harmful because it triggers our self-protection mode, MIT Sloan sr lecturer Giardella says in

Here’s the hard truth about leadership: it either forces you to get stronger or slowly destroys your life. There is no in-between. This is why taking care of yourself as a leader is so critical. This is exactly what we will discuss at our interactive FREE CEO workshop on Tuesday, January 10 at noon EST. During this workshop we will discuss leadership habits to better take care of yourself, so that you can better take care of others. We will focus on three specific topics: – How to improve your mental fitness – so that you can better handle stress. – Make yourself useless – so that you have more time to grow your business. – Tackle tough conversations – to help your team members be the best version of themselves. The CEO Growth Workshop is FREE and is open to all growth-minded CEOs who want to become better leaders. Date: Tuesday January 10 at noon EST / 6 pm CET.  Register